Young carers discuss children’s mental health

3 February 2025

Good mental health is the foundation children and young people need to cope with stress, build healthy relationships and learn to regulate emotionally. The path in front of us connects back to our past – positive childhood experiences aren’t only important in the here and now, they can benefit us throughout life. Young carers face many additional challenges, which can have a significant impact on their mental health. We caught up with four young carers to find out what’s important to them when it comes to children’s mental health.

Young carers on children’s mental health

“Being a young carer means you have to care for someone else as well as yourself. There are things that you have to do for that person, and it can put a lot of stress on you as you feel a lot of responsibility for them. You feel like you have to be a part of them in some ways and can’t be yourself; a part of you and your time is dedicated to that person.

“It affects all aspects of your life – there’s school, social life and the young carer role. Expectation is a big deal and, although it’s not said out loud, you’re expected to care for your loved one in a certain way. You feel like you’re the only person who can do it because you’ve been doing it. There’s an expectation to be GOOD.” – Sophie, young carer.

It affects all aspects of your life - there’s school, social life and the young carer role.

Sophie, young carer

Friendships can be very influential and play a crucial role in shaping us emotionally, socially, and psychologically. As the young carers go on to discuss this can offer both a positives and negatives…

It’s important to think about the people you’re hanging round with and whether they’re people you should take with you.

Poppy, young carer

“I agree… It’s the kind of time where people our age step away from family and go to friends for support because they’re sharing the same experiences – they’re people who you can go for support because people who are older might not know.” – Isla, young carer

“But then you see it happening with some people and their influences. If you fall in with the wrong group that can become a problem as, at this age, you go through a lot of positive and negative experiences. Some of the people around you might help you build on those experiences in a positive way and others might use it a reason or excuse for behaving a certain way.” – Sophie

I have a few friends who had been cyber bullied and it had a big impact on their mental health.

Isla, young carer

There’s no doubt that it’s a challenging time to be a young person, and many parents are concerned about their child’s online safety. However, our young carers can see both the opportunities and risks that growing up with social media has presented them…

“Social media and online culture are big topics, and they can be good and bad. On one hand you can sign up for mental health places; there’s a lot of online mental health stuff that can be supportive, and there’s now a lot of mental health services that you can go to. There’s a lot more help around and, thanks to things like social media, young carers are a lot more recognised.” – Amelia, young carer

“Sometimes people speak about before and after social media and online culture, but you can’t compare the two… Mental health wasn’t spoken about at all in the past, but now it’s a topic that’s pushed.” – Sophie

“But, on the other hand, you didn’t have to worry about cyber bullying. I have a few friends who had been cyber bullied and it had a big impact on their mental health. It was anonymous but the person who was doing it… you could tell they knew who they were. It had a big impact on them, and they were scared to go to school and didn’t know what was going on.” – Isla

“Things can spread so quickly. Something started in a group chat can be all over people’s social media. It can be really scary how quickly that can develop, and I think people our age are aware of their digital fingerprint.” – Sophie

“It doesn’t help that over social media and online in general you can’t get a good idea of tone and mood, unlike hearing someone’s voice.” – Poppy

 

School can be a mixed bag for young carers, while some find it a place that they can just be children away from their caring responsibilities, others have found a lack of understand from teachers about their caring roles and keeping up with homework difficult…

There’s lots of different ways it’s good and bad. This might sound weird, but as a young carer it can feel a lot like people don’t respect your human rights. Teachers take away a lot of your freedom to do things on your own schedule and, as a young carer, when you don’t have time to do your homework a lot of teachers aren’t aware of why. It’s good to have young carers’ champions that you can speak to about it.

Amelia, young carer

“But, personally, school is where I go where I can speak to someone that’s not my family and go and be away from my home situation. In some ways it’s where I go to escape. Young carers are young people who are forced to grow up, and school is sometimes a place where you can still be a child.” – Isla

“Not all schools are like that though, and school isn’t always the best place for young carers. Primary school is a lot easier but as soon as you get into the secondary environment there’s all these expectations and criteria. It’s a strict order and then you come home and you’re met by those responsibilities that not everyone has.” – Sophie

“It’s not fair – it’s unbalanced. There’s only so many young carers so it’s hard for people to understand that we’re dealing with stress and panic all the time, and we’re trying to find balance.” – Poppy

 

A positive of being a young carer and having to take on more responsibilities at a young age means many children and young people feel more mature than their years…

“I think being young carers makes us more capable.” – Amelia

Being a young carer you learn emotional maturity, prioritising things and being organised. You feel the stress of being an adult sometimes, but you also feel really grown up. You don’t have that choice, so you have to take on the position of a child and an adult at the same time.

Sophie, young carer

We concluded the conversation by asking how they thought things could be improved for young carers and why respite is so important…

“Funding is really important. There are so many opportunities available that young carers could have but don’t because there’s never enough money. It would be good to have funding specifically for young carers.” – Amelia

“We mentioned school, but when school is bad the reason is often because some young carers in the country are getting support, and some aren’t… That’s the reality, and it’s important that all schools recognise they have young carers.” – Poppy

“You want to be a child sometimes and feel free and free from responsibility. Children shouldn’t have to carry the responsibility that parents do.” – Isla

“It’s difficult seeing friends going out when you’re busy or catching up with schoolwork. Respite gives us time for self care and wellbeing. It just makes things better.” – Sophie

“We all love physical activity. It can be any sport, anything… Just something that you can be involved in which takes your mind out of the place it was originally so you can be somewhere different.” – Amelia

“It’s amazing to take a break, as you want that space for yourself.” – Poppy

We support children and young people through a range of services to provide the right support at the right time.

Our young carers services are very responsive to the needs of the young people they serve; offering holistic support for the family so that young people can pursue their own needs, 1:1 mentoring and counselling, peer support groups, and opportunities for young people to raise awareness of the issues that matter to them.

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Young people need and deserve our support, not just as the adults of tomorrow, but for who they are and what they’re going through now. Support a young carer today.