How FamilyLine befriender inspired Lisa to help others

14 January 2025

Lisa* shares how finding a FamilyLine befriender helped her turn her life around. After COVID, Lisa struggled with her mental health medication, work, finances and feeling isolated. Her recovery is ongoing, but when she’s in a better place, she wants to volunteer with FamilyLine and help others

I’d been on long term medication for a mental health condition for 20 years which had really helped me to deal with everything thrown at me – I was a trojan.  

Because of complications during COVID, I had to come off it quickly when you’re supposed to take years and, because COVID also affected healthcare provision, I spent most of 2020 trying to be seen by doctors to sort out a replacement.

 

 

I was also struggling with empty nest syndrome, as my daughter had left home, and the loss of my job, which had finished when the office closed due to COVID.

It was so difficult as a lot of jobs changed overnight and some just don’t exist anymore. I was trying to make ends meet, but when I found myself working for a while I would use my wages to pay off my debts and then I would run into problems with universal credit, so I was living hand to mouth and going to the food bank.  

What was worse was that my replacement medication made me put on weight, as I always seemed hungry, and I wasn’t going out because I found the idea of leaving the house really daunting. Thankfully I felt really safe and at peace in my house, and I had great neighbours who I could sit out in the garden and chat to, but I’d really cocooned myself. 

Meeting Katie my FamilyLine befriender 

I’ve been looking to volunteer for a service like FamilyLine for a long time.   

I’m on some volunteer websites and it came up as a volunteering opportunity but, when we were going through a call where FamilyLine take you through the role, they mentioned their counselling and befriending services.  

I thought “ok… I want to help other people, but I might be good looking into that myself first”.

However, when I spoke to the FamilyLine coordinator they were a bit wary of referring me to their counsellors as it’s only six sessions and I’ve got trauma from my childhood. Instead the coordinator recommended I try working with a FamilyLine befriender… and that was wonderful.   

It was a great match as Katie* had started training as a counsellor, and she was a lovely person – I was worried that I wouldn’t have anything to say but the time just flew by each time. She was younger than me, but she was very empathetic and insightful for her age. Speaking with her was like having someone look at your life with a fresh pair of eyes, and it was good to talk to someone impartial who’s not involved in my life in any way.   

I’m a bit timid initially, as I’ve had situations in the past where things have happened or been said during conversations that have blown up in my face, so I fear repercussions. But it just flowed. It was amazing as we hit it off right away and, after we chatted, I thought “where did the time go?”  

Finding peace with myself  

What also helped is that I’d been referred to the gym to help with the weight gain and that helped me get out the house to use the gym and the exercise machines at the park.   

It was like the support of Katie and the time at the gym worked together, as I would look forward to the conversations we’d have, and the work at the gym somehow helped me make better food choices.   

At the last session we both felt a little bit sad about it ending and she said “I want to give you a hug”, but I said “that’s what you’ve been doing every session - you’ve been hugging me on the phone”.

I still want to volunteer on FamilyLine’s helpline one day as people open up to me easily – friends say “you got their whole life story there” when I meet people. I just really love talking to people, but I want to be in a better place before I do.  

You see, in that last session Katie also asked me how I felt when I started the sessions and, because I hadn’t externalised it, I’d never realised I was feeling quite low before I started talking to her.  

But at the last session I felt at peace. Speaking to her, I’d realised I was looking for total harmony with every aspect of my life, which is impossible… but feeling at peace with yourself is a good start.  

FamilyLine is more than a helpline. If you need it we also offer virtual befriending or short-term counselling.

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